Quotables!

High time for another round of quotables! Hope we can make you laugh with our original, genuine, authentic P family humor!! =)

Hannah: Wow, your mandolin rang when I said that.
Sarah: Yeah. My mandolin’s very musical.

Joe: Is Jane Fairfax the villain?
Hannah: No, she’s the brunette.

Mom: So, Abby, have you got a happy heart now?
Abby: (grumpily) Yes.
*pause*
M: Okay, let me see your cheerful smile!
A: (quietly) Yes ma’am.
*issues weak smile*
M: What kind of a smile is that? Try again. Say “Yes ma’am!” and smile!
A: (through gritted teeth) I can’t smile and TALK!

Sarah: But the main character! What’s the point of that?
Roberta: Well, sometimes main characters do die, you know. Sometimes that’s the whole story.
S: Well, my main character isn’t getting killed off. He’s as healthy as a cucumber.

Abby: Hey, Mom, can I tell you a joke?
Mom: Sure.
A: Okay, so if you’re in a room with no windows or doors and no way to get out, with a mirror and a table, what do you do?
M: Uhhh…
A: (triumphantly) You look in the mirror, see what you saw, cut the table in half, and climb out the hole!!
All of us: *total silence*
A: Don’t you get it?!
Joe: (slowly) I think what you mean is… you look in the mirror… see what you saw…
Sarah: Pick up the saw, cut the table in half, put the two halves together…
A: (once again triumphant) And climb out the whole!!

Abby: Mom, you know that thing that you put around your arm so you can tell how fast your heart is going?
Mom: Oh, you mean the blood pressure cuff.
A: Yeah, well, Mom, let me tell you how fast my thumps are going.

Sarah: I don’t want to leave home just yet. You know I don’t like being alone. God said “it is not good for man to be alone,” but He didn’t say anything about Sarah.

Dad (“helping” Roberta in the kitchen): Okay, now what do I do?
Roberta: Well, you can hand me that measuring cup.
D: Okay, now what do I do?
R: Now you can get me the flour.
D: Okay, now what do I do?
R: Okay, so now you get out of the way!

Sarah (coming out of the theater after watching Tangled): Hannah, did you see, did you see? Flynn has brown eyes!! (*dreamily*) My kind of hero…

Abby: *breathless* Where did you get that? Why are you wearing my shirt?
Hannah: What?! This isn’t your shirt!
A: (deflates) Oh. It…. Isn’t….?
Seconds later…
A: Sarah, whose shirt is she wearing, mine or yours?
H: Why are you asking her? Why are you so concerned about my wardrobe?
S: Umm… that’s hers. Yours is different.
A: (shouting) HERS?!
S: Yeah, Mom got her one in California too.
A: (incredulously) Mom, you got HER a RED SHIRT?
H: (throws her hands in the air) Am I not capable of owning a red shirt?!